Russell

Today I hopped on the ferry to Russell. I found it hard to believe that this quaint little town full of white-picket fences was once known as "The Hell Hole of the Pacific". It was one of the first ports in New Zealand, back before there was a New Zealand, when lawlessness and pirates prevailed.

I started my day with, what else? Lunch! At the suggestion of some girls from my hostel, I ate a a cute little cafe overlooking the water. They had gluten-free bread, so I ordered a chicken salad sandwich. Apparently chicken salad doesn't mean the same thing here as it does in Texas. (Come to think of it, that goes for everything here.) The waitress looked at me like I was insane when I said I wanted my chicken salad on toasted bread. When my leafy greens and ripe tomatoes with red onion and chicken arrived, I understood. It wasn't the mayo-slathered chicken salad I was expecting. It was a salad, with chicken.
You can tell my day was action-packed when I regale you with a story about chicken salad.

I compulsively took photos for the rest of the afternoon and visited the Pompallier Mission. It was the first Roman Catholic Mission in New Zealand, so the Protestants were understandably pissed. I was interested in visiting it because it was founded by the Marianists, the same fools that founded my high school. The mission was responsible for printing the first copies of the Roman Catholic Bible in Maori. The whole interior of the mission is set up with printing presses and book-making accoutrements, as well as leather-making materials. All of the flooring and much of the ceiling beams were made from ancient kauri wood. (The same type of tree as Tane Mahuta.)

The mission was surrounded by tropical flora and fauna, framing a manicured lawn overlooking the sea. I found myself wondering, 'Maybe celibacy wouldn't be so bad if you had this as a view...'
Apparently the brothers made up for their lack of sex with drinking, as shown by the various liquor bottles found at the site in later years.

After I visited the mission, I drank some lemonade. The end.